She Saw What Was Possible
Sometimes one example can expand a young person’s entire vision of who they can become.
“Ooo…a Woman Ref!”
One evening, my daughters and I were watching a Utah Jazz game.
In the middle of the game, my youngest daughter, Makayla, noticed one of the officials and said with genuine excitement:
“Ooo…a woman ref!”
It was a simple observation, but the way she said it stayed with me.
She was surprised.
She was impressed.
And for just a moment, she seemed proud to see a woman doing something she had not expected to see a woman doing.
I could almost hear the thought forming in her mind:
If she can do that, maybe I can too.
That moment reminded me how powerful examples can be—especially for young girls who are still deciding what is possible for their lives.
Seeing Can Help Us Believe
Before someone creates something, pursues something, or becomes something, they usually have to imagine it first.
That is why representation matters.
When a girl sees a woman leading, creating, officiating, building, teaching, competing, healing, or serving, the boundaries of her imagination begin to expand.
The example silently tells her:
You belong here.
You are capable.
There may be a place for you too.
Role models do not remove every obstacle, but they help young people see that obstacles can be overcome.
Sometimes the first step toward becoming something is simply seeing that someone like you has already begun the journey.
The Courage to Keep Going
The transcript shares the experience of NBA referee Lauren Holtkamp-Sterling.
Early in her officiating career, a parent confronted her after a game and told her directly that she did not belong there because she was a woman.
She could have allowed that moment to convince her to quit.
Instead, it forced her to answer some deeper questions:
Why am I doing this?
Why does it matter to me?
Am I willing to continue even when others doubt me?
She kept going.
Years later, she became a full-time NBA official.
Her example teaches an important principle:
Confidence is not the absence of opposition. Confidence is continuing when opposition tries to define you.
You Do Not Need Everyone’s Permission
There will always be voices that try to place limits on people.
They may say:
You are not strong enough.
You are not experienced enough.
You do not belong here.
People like you do not do this.
But another person’s limited vision does not determine your potential.
God did not give every person the same gifts, path, or mission. He created individuals with different abilities, interests, strengths, and opportunities.
You do not need to shrink your gifts to make someone else comfortable.
You do not need to apologize for becoming capable.
And you do not need everyone’s permission to pursue something good.
Strength and Kindness Belong Together
Sometimes the world presents strength and tenderness as opposites.
It suggests that to become powerful, a person must become hard.
To become respected, they must lose sensitivity.
To become confident, they must become aggressive.
But real strength does not require losing compassion.
A woman can be:
courageous and kind
ambitious and generous
confident and humble
determined and compassionate
powerful and tenderhearted
Those qualities do not weaken one another.
They strengthen one another.
The world does not need people who are merely powerful. It needs people whose strength is guided by wisdom, goodness, and love.
The Example of Esther
Queen Esther is one of scripture’s clearest examples of strength joined with compassion.
She was placed in a position of influence, but that position alone did not save her people.
She had to act.
She had to speak.
She had to approach the king despite the personal danger involved.
Esther was not powerful because she was unafraid.
She was powerful because she acted with courage while facing fear.
Her concern for others moved her beyond comfort and into action.
Her story shows that tenderness is not weakness.
Compassion can become the reason a person finds the courage to stand.
The Strength to Be Kind
Some of the greatest forms of strength are rarely celebrated by the world.
It takes strength to forgive.
It takes courage to remain kind when others are cruel.
It takes determination to love someone through a difficult season.
It takes confidence to refuse to become bitter.
Physical strength may impress people for a moment, but the strength of a good heart can influence generations.
That kind of power is not loud.
It is steady.
It lifts rather than controls.
It inspires rather than intimidates.
And it helps others believe they can rise too.
The Responsibility to Empower
Those of us who influence young people should ask ourselves:
What possibilities are we helping them see?
Do our words expand their confidence or quietly limit it?
Do we encourage their gifts or pressure them into narrow expectations?
Young people are constantly gathering messages about who they are and what they can become.
Parents, teachers, leaders, coaches, and friends can help them recognize that their worth is not determined by old stereotypes or someone else’s assumptions.
Sometimes empowerment sounds like:
I believe in you.
Sometimes it sounds like:
You should try.
Sometimes it is simply making sure a young person sees examples of good people who have done difficult things before them.
Become the Example You Needed
You may not realize who is watching you.
A young girl may see you doing something brave and begin to believe she can be brave too.
Someone may watch the way you handle criticism and learn how to keep going.
Another person may notice that you are both strong and kind and realize they do not have to choose between the two.
You do not have to become famous to become a role model.
You only have to live with enough courage and goodness that someone else can see what is possible.
Your example may become another person’s permission to believe.
Anchoring Quote
“When you’re seeing women aspiring, and how powerful and how smart and how good they are at whatever craft, you have to share. This is the way we can help little girls growing up.” — Violet Palmer
Practical Reflection
Consider these questions:
Who helped me believe more was possible for my life?
Have I allowed another person’s expectations to limit me?
Do I use my influence to encourage the gifts of others?
What kind of example am I setting for the young people who watch me?
Is my strength guided by kindness and compassion?
Sometimes the greatest gift we can give another person is helping them see themselves differently.
Today’s Daily Challenge
Empower someone today.
You might:
Tell a young woman what strength or gift you see in her.
Share the story of someone who broke through a barrier.
Encourage someone to pursue an opportunity they are doubting.
Thank a woman whose example has influenced your life.
Take one step toward something you once assumed was not possible for you.
Help someone see beyond the limits they have inherited.
Closing
That night, Makayla did not give a speech about equality, courage, or potential.
She simply saw a woman officiating an NBA game and said:
“Ooo…a woman ref!”
But inside that simple reaction was something powerful.
She had seen a new possibility.
That is why examples matter.
That is why courage matters.
And that is why each of us should use our influence to help others recognize the gifts God has placed within them.
Believe in the women and girls in your life.
Encourage them.
Make room for their gifts.
Celebrate their courage.
And remind them that strength does not require giving up kindness.
The world needs both.
