Spiritual—but Not Religious? Finding the Balance That Actually Builds You
You don’t have to choose between spirituality and religion—when used correctly, they were meant to work together.
You’ve probably heard it—or maybe even said it yourself:
“I’m spiritual… just not religious.”
It’s a powerful statement.
And if we’re being honest, for many people it comes from a real place of pain.
Pain from experiences.
Pain from people.
Pain from feeling judged, controlled, or misunderstood.
And because of that pain, it can feel easier—maybe even safer—to walk away from religion altogether and focus only on a personal connection with God.
But what if there’s more to it than that?
When One Without the Other Falls Short
I’ve known people who walked away from religion and held onto spirituality.
I’ve also known people who held tightly to religion… but never developed a real relationship with God.
And here’s what I’ve seen:
👉 Both, on their own, can fall short.
Because they were never meant to replace each other.
They were meant to work together.
A Simple Illustration
There’s a moment in the Disney movie Mulan where soldiers are training to climb a pole.
They’re given two weights:
One represents strength
The other represents discipline
At first, no one can reach the top.
Until Mulan realizes something:
👉 The weights weren’t meant to hold her back…
👉 They were meant to help her climb—together
That’s how spirituality and religion work.
Not competing.
Not opposing.
Working together to lift you higher.
When Religion Hurts
Let’s be real for a moment.
Sometimes religion does hurt.
People misuse it.
Leaders make mistakes.
Families apply it in unhealthy ways.
Or life circumstances make it painful to be around.
That pain is real.
And it’s valid.
But here’s an important distinction:
👉 The pain often comes from people within religion…
Not from the purpose of religion itself.
What Religion Is Meant to Be
Think of religion like a hospital.
A place for:
Healing
Growth
Support
Learning
But here’s the catch:
Hospitals are full of sick people.
Which means:
Imperfection will be there
Mistakes will happen
People will fall short
That doesn’t make the hospital bad.
It means it’s serving its purpose.
The Real Question
So the real question isn’t:
“Are the people perfect?”
Because they won’t be.
The real question is:
👉 Is this helping me grow closer to God?
Because that’s the entire point.
When Religion Stops Working
Here’s where things can go wrong:
When we start serving religion… instead of letting it serve us.
We go through the motions.
We check the boxes.
We do things because we feel we should… not because we want to.
And slowly…
We lose the connection.
What It Was Always Meant to Do
Religion was never meant to replace your relationship with God.
It was meant to support it.
As Neal A. Maxwell once described, religion can act as “scaffolding for the soul.”
Scaffolding doesn’t become the building.
It helps build it.
And in this case…
👉 God isn’t building a church as much as He’s building you.
The Danger of Walking Away Completely
Here’s something worth thinking about:
When people step away from religion entirely…
Do they usually:
Pray more?
Serve more?
Stay more connected to God?
Or less?
For many, over time…
It becomes less.
Because they’ve removed a tool that helped them stay anchored.
Anchoring Quote
“Was the sabbath made for man, or man for the sabbath?” — Bible (Mark 2:27)
Practical Reflection
Take an honest look at your own life:
Are you relying only on spirituality… and missing helpful structure?
Or are you relying only on religion… and missing real connection?
Where might you need more balance?
Today’s Daily Challenge
Choose one way today to strengthen both:
👉 Do something intentional to connect with God personally
👉 AND use a resource or opportunity that religion provides
Let them work together.
Not separately.
Closing
You don’t have to choose between being spiritual or religious.
You can be both.
And when you are…
You don’t just go through the motions.
You grow.
You connect.
And you become who God is trying to help you become.
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🔗 https://joshdowns.com/come-follow-me-for-teens
